How to Get Married for the Second Time
Learn the ins and outs of getting married for the second time.
Female Speaker: We are at the central park boathouse in New York City a popular setting for a lake side wedding was spectacular views of the city. Today over a half a lot weddings include a bride or groom who has been married before. Second weddings, which often involve children from a previous marriage, can be difficult to navigate. Couples who remarry are anxious to find just the right mix of ceremony and celebration to mark their new union.
Millie Martini Bratten: Second marriage is used to be low profile affairs not any more. There used to be a stigma to marrying again because that made got an divorce and today that is completely changed and relaxed and actually people live quite long now and they were very happy if you found somebody to share your life with and that's really cause for celebration. But a man or woman heading to the alter for a second time is usually older and may have children. As a result a mind filed of delicate questions can come up. Should a second time bride wear white, should she be given away by her father. How should children from previous marriages be included? The bottom line try and plan a wedding that makes everyone involved feel comfortable.
Millie Martini Bratten: If you did married before and have children from the first marriage a great way to start them feeling like their part of this new family is to involve them in the wedding if they would like to be involved. Then people were doing this in a verity of ways either the bride will be walked on the agile by her young son or her young daughter and given away by her children, they might do a reading or say something special.
Female Speaker: I have never in my life see, my mom so happy.
Millie Martini Bratten: Often we have seen the bride and the groom light the unity candle together with the child symbolizing the formation of a new family.
Male Speaker: Is we give thanks to stay for the love, which brings every individual together so to do we recognize the merging of a new family.
Female Speaker: Yes.
Male Speaker: I have two sons Justin and Hayden. Boys are, who definitely part of our lives and they love Jill and dad they had to be, and we proposed, I have thought them in it. That we have been married once before both was and there was a big ceremonies and they want to sit in the quaint and small, you may now save your marriage with the kiss.
Millie Martini Bratten: Second weddings may be smaller in size but not always the emphasis is instead on making the wedding feel different from the first.
Female Speaker: I got married first at March 26 to my college sweetheart, we have been dating six years and was the sort of the natural progression of things in our relationship but here into realized that was just a beginning state and entered it thankfully before children before got for long but we did have a large wedding, so when I met Adam once we started talking about getting married I don't want an another big one.
Adam: She actually wanted me to plan it. Because she is saying she wanted, I wanted the big wedding, she wanted the small wedding.
Female Speaker: That was the new planner I didn't want even go through it again.
Male Speaker: Right.
Female Speaker: I wanted to distinguish it significantly from the first one instead of at being a night time wedding we did a Sunday lunch time then instead of black time so it was day time so it was a little bit less formal.
Female Speaker: My first wedding they were a ton of my parent's friends there.
Male Speaker: We had a there are hundred people ultimately and it was really a great, great intervene wedding.
Female Speaker: The commitment from the hearts of your hearts that you want it make to resite for you, there is nothing hidden that it is not revealed.
Female Speaker: Other ways to make a second wedding stand out, consider making the vows different from those exchanged before.
Millie Martini Bratten: Processing a big trend in destination weddings, which is great particular if you have children from a formal marriage everyone goes together to a neutral destination often in island and plan a ceremony of a long-weekend.
Female Speaker: Getting married in a church can sometimes be difficult as many places of worship will not allow second marriage ceremonies so check with your clergy far in advance. The good news is most second time brides and grooms are paying for this wedding themselves, so they can plan the wedding they really want.
Female Speaker: With my first wedding my mother pretty much planned the whole.
Female Speaker: You know this time around we did the whole thing. You know we did we selected, where we wanted it to be, we did all of the research together so as much for us. And there are some advantages to having planned a wedding before.
Female Speaker: My first wedding I was tired up in the detail of the wedding and I was very nervous that something was going to go wrong. This time around I felt I know what I am doing little experience in this.
Male Speaker: He was helpful that Mary and I had been married before and which she had been down this path I never been down this path.
Female Speaker: We weren't engaged for that long a period of time before the wedding.
Male Speaker: We were engaged May 15th, we were married September 30.
Female Speaker: Right.
Male Speaker: So short view.
Female Speaker: And what should a bride wear when marrying again, it's entirely up to the bride.
Female Speaker: I didn't want the typical wedding dress, because it was my second wedding and you know I was forty plus and so I decided that I want to just do something that was much more of an evening gown, I entered up finding a dress to exactly really, what I wanted on sale at a department store.
Female Speaker: I was come to my first wearing another traditional long way wedding gown and this wasn't my first wedding but then I thought about form Adams perspective and then I realized that for my new husband I am a new bride for him and that I don't want to diminish that aspect of the day for him, so I pulled out all the stuffs and wear a long white gown with the veil and peace all the works and I think it look nice. I don't know what other people thought that it was our day --
Female Speaker: When only one member of the couple has been married before it's important to remember that for the other person this is his or her first wedding experience be sure to get that person the attention deserved.
Female Speaker: I really wanted to make sure that the wedding was what he wanted in addition to what I wanted and I think that's what really made it special.
Female Speaker: Every second wedding is different just as every remarriage is different you need to the couple and being able to personalize has helped a great deal towards having society look at second weddings in a different way.
Female Speaker: First time I felt the wedding was you know big this time the wedding was just a day, it was a beautiful wonderful day, we had a terrific time but I was excited more for what was come endurance.
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